Let it Burn...

Taking Usher's advice and walking away... So I'm not usually one to talk about my emotions or feelings (I've actually been told that getting me to open up about my feelings is like talking to a wall) but for one night only, I'm gonna say what's really on my mind. An emotional fire sale if you will. I have decided to leave LA. I'm headed back to michigan to get some more schooling, probably for only one more semester but you never quite know with me I guess.

I have heard a lot of talk about how it's always hard to move to a new far away place but really, I just hate LA. California is wonderful, San Diego is gorgeous and the ocean is amazing, but Los Angeles might just be the worst city I have ever lived in, counting Springfield Ohio where I spent my first semester of undergrad. It is overwhelming and confusing. Did I give it a fair shake? Probably not, but honestly I would rather be happy than to try and force something that isn't working. I am sure that given enough time, I could stand living here but I would rather enjoy my neighborhood and feel a sense of community than live in this disparate sea of millions of people. Unlike New York, LA is scattered all over a large area with no rhyme or reason. And I'm sure that in time I could figure out the city and know where everything is, but I would still have to wait in traffic for an hour to go 10 miles. Two of the things I hate most in the world are lines and traffic. Driving here is a nightmare and I miss being able to walk everywhere.

I guess what it boils down to is that I'm not happy here. Who wants to be unhappy? I've got a plan for the next 6 months or so and during that time I'll figure out what I'll do next. Perhaps out here but more likely back to NY to try and make it out there. I'm not giving up on wanting to be a director but I did realize that career dreams are not more important to me than the people in my life. It sucks being 3000 miles away from the people I care about and it sucks even more being 3 hours behind them. I will spend the next semester writing and honing my skills as a director and hopefully working on some things to do with tv or film. I feel kind of like I failed which sucks becuase I'm trying to tell myself that I didn't, that I"m doing the right thing. Anyways, it was a pretty hard decision to make but once I made it it felt like the right thing to do. Everything happens for a reason and I think that I learned some things about myself that I may not have learned if I never moved out here. Live and learn I guess.

So I'll blog again soon hopefully. Did anyone watch my original Subaru Diaries? Should I do it again on the return trip? As always, get your feet off the ground and reach for the stars. Pain heals, chicks dig scars and glory lasts forever. Go big or go home. Carpe diem. Your heart is free, have the courage to follow it. Life's short, live large.

-M, p, z & shredder

oh ps - I guess this wasn't really that emotional or expressive. that's just how I am though I guess. New album I picked up, Katie Herzig, she's fab. Check it out. also the title was in refernce to the Usher song, not the wild fires out here, which I want to talk about soon.

What to Watch...

The last couple of weeks has been interesting. Eye opening maybe. I've been doing a lot of thinking about my life and questioning what I'm doing in my life. Could be headed for a big change soon but since I don't know yet, I'll leave it at that. Should decide within the next week or so whether or not I actually want to stay in LA though and if this city is really all it's cracked up to be. Now I would say no, it's not. I'd like to move but we'll see what happens. One never knows where life will lead...

On to less cryptic talk... There are a lot of new shows on the boob tube these days and while I don't have cable at the moment I will comment on what to watch. A top 5 I guess. First of all this is just for shows that I watch or deem worthy of being watched. This does not include shows that are currently not on such as Psych (my favorite show on tv), Monk, Entourage or Pistons basketball which as we all know is always the greatest thing to watch on tv or in person. First I'd like to talk about a couple of shows that didn't make the cut but are worth mentioning. I know there has been a lot of negative reviews about it but if you haven't seen "Cavemen" then you should check it out. I'm not a fan of sitcoms. There is an abundance of terrible shows without a comedian that just aren't funny. The fact that Two and a Half Men is still the top rated sitcom boggles my mind. It is the worst show ever. It has a laugh track for god's sake. Cavemen actually isn't half bad though. It spends a little too much time setting up jokes that don't always work, but usually the dialogue isn't half bad and actually pretty funny. Also Carpoolers isn't bad. ABC has both these shows on tuesday between 8 and 9. Carpoolers isn't as funny as Cavemen and will probably get cancelled but there are some great conversations that the 4 main characters have. It's more of a guy show than anything and worth a look if you're bored on tuesday at 8:30. Catch it before it's gone.

This is a pretty close contest actually. The top three shows are all really good and the last two are good but I don't hold my breath waiting for them. Funny that all of my top 5 are on two networks, 3 on NBC and 2 on ABC. It says something about the qaulity of shows people like (2 and a half men, other bad sitcoms and dramas) are on CBS which is the number 1 rated network. I don't understand people sometimes. This is why Bush is still in office.

At number 5 is Grey's Anatomy. How the mighty have fallen. It isn't exactly the show it used to be. It's starting to get what I call "ER Syndrome." What happens is that shows that have great chemistry with the characters make us care about what happens to them and as a result, writers make these crazy freak accidents like train wrecks or plane crashes or drownings to make a really dramatic "can't miss" episode. ER took this to the extreme and kept on having all these insane accidents which is why I stopped watching. Grey's is doing it not with accidents but with story lines for characters and it's getting old. Every week something insane happens that just doesn't work for the show and it is taking away all that I used to like about it.

At number 4 is Heroes. Still a really good show but needs to do a little more than last year to keep me waiting for the next episode like last year. It's hard to match because last year it was so original, but now that there are established characters it's slowing down a little bit. It is early still and is setting up the season so I am giving it a little slack and time. Still a really good show and definitely worth watching if you have the time Monday night.













At number 3 is Chuck. A new show on NBC that comes on right before Heroes. It's about a Geek Squad type guy who got zapped or something (I missed the Pilot) by some super computer and downloaded all this super computer info into his brain and now helps out a super hot chick spy and her partner. It is actually funny and well paced and the characters are enjoyable. I find myself growing attached to each of them and I like where it's going. Not saying it is some deep drama, but there is definitely more depth to it and the characters than the light fluffy show it would come off as. Check it out, it's worth it.













At number 2 is the not so surprise hit Pushing Daisies. It's on ABC on wed at 8 and it's fantastic. It's created by the same guy who brought you Heroes and Produced by the same imagination that brought us Men in Black and Lemony Snickets and a bunch of other fantastical stories based in reality. It's really well written and acted and fun to watch. It's pretty original and the characters are all fun to watch. If you haven't watched it do yourself a favor and check it out. You can watch all the eps online at abc.com and you won't regret it.
















At number 1 is NBC's Friday Night Lights. Picking up where it left off last season as number 1, it is definitely worth your time. It moved to friday night at 8 which will probably mean it's ratings will drop and it will be one of those amazing shows that gets cancelled for no reason other than people would rather watch Charlie Sheen and some pudgy kid make terrible jokes that a laugh track is even hesitant to laugh at. It's acting is still awesome and the story lines, except for one new ridiculous one (that is getting less ridiculous) are great. It may be spreaing itself too thin at the moment because all of the characters are going through their own drama, but it keeps me in on a Friday night which is pretty easy since I have no friends.

Anyways, that's all I feel like doing right now. I'd talk about some movies but to be honest I haven't been watching as many as I used to in NY. LA is a drag so far so if I talked you into moving out here, hang on to that thought because I might not be here for long. Headed down to surf again this weekend which should be awesome so I might not get to blog again til Sunday. If not, keep your ear to the grindstone and all that stuff. yadda yadda yadda.

-M, p,z & shredder

oh ps - lots of new albums out as well. I haven't been able to keep up but if you have heard anything good, let me know or burn me a copy.

pps - Forgot to mention but definitely my guilty pleasure this season: Gossip Girl. It's on the CW at 9 on wed. It's f-ing ridiculous. Most of it doesn't make sense and boggles my mind and of course all the highschool kids look to be around their early 20s but it seems the creators of the OC have done it again. Not as electric as the oc but def all the drama and then some.

Stair-Master...

First off I forgot to mention the new title for Harold and Kumar 2, "H&K Escape From Guantanamo Bay." It's going to be ridiculous. I can't wait til next year.


So I had my first job in the industry on Saturday and I must say it was awesome. I had so much fun. I was expecting to be bossed around to no end by people who had short tempers and loved to yell, but instead it was a very calm fun set to be on. It was for a show on cable (not mentioning the network name b/c I'm not sure if I'm allowed to) and it was pretty awesome. I signed a lot of papers, one of those may have been a non-disclosure agreement which would mean I can't say anything about the show specifically so I will refrain from talking about it extensively. But I will say that I am in it a couple times. It's a reality type show and I'm in it as myself for two quick scenes. So if you saw me on the Tyra show last week look for me on this show which I will name in the near future after I find out if I am allowed to or not. There was a 'challenge' on the show however, which I was a stand in for during run throughs and I must say it was pretty hard. We were on the 18th floor of a building and we had to run down the stairs to the 10th, then back up to the 18th, then carry 2 (heavy) dummies down the hallway to another flight of stairs where we had 5 minutes to get to the roof which was essentially the 31st floor. I made it in 4:50 and I was struggling. Anyways, all in all it was really really fun and I met a lot of nice people and one of those people I met got me a job intervie with her boss tomorrow. I'm sooo glad I quit that telemarketing job...


















Also I'm not sure how many have you heard but over the weekend (http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071020/ap_en_ce/books_harry_potter) JK Rowling told the press that Prof. Dumbledore was gay. And that he was in fact in love with Gellert Grindelwald, whom we all know he successfully dueled later in life. It's pretty awesome if you ask me. Extreme Christians have had a long battle with Harry Potter and I remember when I first started reading the books back in highschool that they believed Rowling was just trying to recruit people into Wicca. Now they believe she is a rebel rouser and claiming that she is trying to make people be Anti-Christian. JK Rowling is awesome, and the fact that she makes these people so mad makes me lover her even more. Hopefully there will be an 8th book about Dumbledore's days with Grindelwald.

That's all for now. I actually started this blog out as a review of new tv shows but that'll have to wait for next time. I'm not one to call out other bloggers but hopefully someone, Brown Guy I'm looking at you, updates his blog soon because there's nothing worse than starting a blog, getting people into it and then quitting (yeah right Muki).

I'm out

-M, p,z & shredder

oh ps - I'm sad MSU lost saturday but glad I didn't watch, I had a much better time working. Good things came from that game though: we played the number 1 team in the country and only lost by one TD, they usually only allow less than 7pts and we scored 17 and it was at OSU. We have a big game this week and then next saturday when Mich comes to town hopefully we can handle our business. Go state.

Boiler Room...

So this was an interesting last few days I guess. I wasn't getting any jobs in production or even in a production office for the last couple weeks so I decided it was time to get a job and make some money. I took a job as a telemarketer (one that only calls businesses and not people's homes so it was only slightly excuciating). That lasted all of one day. I went in on Tuesday and met with the site manager and he told me to come back for training the next day. The pay was $10 and hour plus commisions and he said most people averaged about $600 a week which isn't too bad seeing how I was making $0. So I went in on Wed and somewhere around noon I realized that I was taking a step back in life. This lady who was training us kept talking about making our dreams come true and doing all you can to realize those dreams, and I realized that my dream wasn't to call businesses 8 hours a day. No, I moved to Hollywood with no money, no friends and no job for a dream. A dream to be a Director. I could care less if I'm famous or not or if I make a lot of money, but I do want to be happy with what I'm doing in life.

During our lunch break I made the decision that not only was I not coming back to work the next day but also that my stomach was really going to hate me for filling it with a Grilled Stuft Chicken Burrito (Taco Bell was the only place around and only the second time I have been there all year). So I finished out the day content in the fact that I would not return but not content in the fact that I had to make calls for a couple hours. I felt really bad quitting so I didn't tell anyone until the next morning when I called and explained myself to one of the nicest bosses in the world who told me to "not foget my days in the boiler room and to remember him when I get famous." It actually was a boiler room. It was a brand new location for this company and the tile floors were cracked and coming apart and the office is shared with two other companies on the floor.

The point of this story is that in my previous 25 years of life I have always just gone with the flow. Taken what's been given. Sure I had to work for things and apply for things and be proactive in my life, but now it seems that isn't enough. But never has it been the case when me just wanting something doesn't make it happen. I don't like asking for help, and have really never been one to make my problems others, but I have realized over the last couple of days that I will go nowehre unless I get help. A girl I went to highschool with lives out here so I reached out to her despite the fact that we were'nt really friends before (and by that I mean pretty much mortal enemies) and fortunately for me she is now the nicest girl in the entire world and has gone out of her way to help me. Anyways, I have my first job tomorrow, it's only one day but it's a start and hopefully I meet some people who can help me out some more and give me a shot at doing something I love. I had to give up an awesome day of surfing in San Diego and watching my Spartans kick some Buckeye ass, but it's a small price to see my name on a call sheet for a real production. The best part is that I get paid. I would do this for free. It's kind of cool getting paid for something you love to do. "Your heart is free, have the courage to follow it."

Anyways, more after my day of work. Blah blah blah...

-M, p,z & shredder

oh ps - lots of movies and shows to review. to come very soon. sunday maybe. GO STATE!!