One Two Three...

Since Sylvia stopped blogging, I'm going to steal her multiple thought format which I've been eyeing for a while.

One

I'm currently at my parents house in Michigan on my way to Chicago tomorrow and I feel like I'm 8 years old again. My mom is yelling at me and I have a lot of errands to do which are basically chores. So yesterday some guy calls and we have the following conversation:
Dude: "Hey, is your dad home?"
Me: "No, he's not. May I take a message?"
Dude: "Oh he's not? Well is he at work?"
Me: "Yes."
Dude: "Well is your mom there?"
Me: "No, she's at work too, but I can leave them a message for you."
Dude: She is?!?! Well that's great! That's a really good thing! I guess I'll just try your dad at work then."

First of all, I'm 27. Most people don't call and say, "is your dad there," they mistake me for my dad. My balls dropped a while back and I don't sound like a 9 year old girl anymore. Second, I started to feel like a little kid again by breaking the cardinal rule of letting a stranger know both my parents weren't home. I should have responded, "Yes, my mom is home but I think she's in the shower right now - hold on [fake muffle phone] {fake yell} Mommmmmm? Mom! No sorry sir, she's still in there but I can have her call you back when she gets out" Those sneaky bastards always fall for that one. Lastly, of course they're at work. It's 1pm on a Tuesday - where are they supposed to be. Granted he could have meant it was great because of the economic conditions but this sounded more of a genuine surprise that two adults could be working at the same time in the middle of the week.

Two

Eye-care retail stores are the new car dealerships. I went in to get some new glasses today because mine are five years old and I see like a bat in the middle of a desert at midday. So I see a nice new trendy frame that make me look like an unstoppable force of good looking and decide I need them. They are only $219 and they're also 30% off! Okay, how much is the eye exam? $54? I can handle that. $200 for the glasses and the exam - that sounds like a steal. So I get the eye exam and they keep trying to sell me on getting my eyes dilated. Not to sound like a snob but if anyone is dilating my eyes it's going to be an Opthamologist and not an Optometrist and it definitely won't be at the mall. So anyway, after successfully refusing to let them charge me extra on doing random things during my exam it comes time to buy my glasses.

So I grab the frames and give them to the counter lady and she says okay have a seat and lets take a look. I sit down, somewhat worried she might try and make out with me after she sees me with them on, and she starts with her routine. "Okay so what kind of lenses do you want?" Now, this is the first time I've tried to get glasses or contacts without eye insurance so I never paid attention to the cost of these things or everything that went into it. So I say, "You mean the lenses don't come with the glasses?" "No, this price is just for the frames." So then I have to pick out lenses. Apparently the cheap ones really suck. So I get the second 'cheapest' I can. $125. I can handle that I guess - they're also 30% off. So then I say okay well whats the total now? Something more than 200 that's for sure.

Then she tells me that I might want to get the lenses with the anti-glare non reflection coating. I say in my head, "That sounds like a car salesman selling me undercoating or rustproofing." So she tells me that my current glasses have the same lenses and if I don't get them I'll look like a big douche wearing sunglass lenses in my regular frames. So I make a lot of gestures and sigh a lot because this will be an additional $80. I flap my arms and ask her how bad it would look and she says, "well if you're making an investment into nice frames you might as well get these - they'll look better and help you see better at night." She pretty much said either get the ones on clearance like you should, or be the baller I know you are and get the coated lenses. So I bite and go for the special lenses. Then she rings me up and the total is something egregious like $350 or something and so I pay and afterwards she tells me that they don't have the lenses in right now (the ones she just goaded me into buying) and that it'll take up to two weeks. I sigh and shrug and leave dejected. But in two weeks, look out because I'm coming with my glasses blazing.

Three

Are my brother and I the only people in the world left who buy cds? iTunes is ruining my life. On one hand, it's great for music I can't find in stores or download illegally. On the other hand, there are so many different versions of albums that come out, I am forced to buy the one on iTunes. Case in point - Everclear is one of my favorite bands. Yesterday they had a new album come out. I was very excited because even though it was just new recordings of their old hits, it had a few new songs and one of my favorite songs of theirs that is not on any album. So after checking the track listing on iTunes I go to the store to buy it. As I'm in line to check out, I notice the track that I love isn't on it. So I get pissed and go back and none of the cds have the extra song. So I go home and check and sure enough it's only on iTunes and only for purchase if you get the whole album. So I bought it off iTunes and raised my arm to the sky and shook it at Steve Jobs.

My problem with it is that while I like the ease and convenience and overall quality of iTunes, I love cds. I grew up buying cds. I love them. I love opening them up and taking off the sticker and taking it out of the case for the first time and looking at the cover art. You know what I hate? Downloading an album, burning it onto a cd, because my iPhone is only 8 gigs and is full and writing the band name and album title in my sh*tty handwriting. I hate burned cds that aren't mixes. It's lame. But you win some, you lose some I guess.

I'm out for a bit. Busy weekend ahead. I'll try and get to you sometime. Go big or go home.

-M, p, z & shredder